In class we discussed the differences between intimacy and sex. We described intimacy as having this special connection. This special connection can be you sharing details with your doctor or someone you trust. Sex on the other hand can be described as physically having intercourse. These definitions change depending on the person; it is self defined.

When I think of sex, I think of those cheesy movies where the girl and the guy fall in love with each. It's like love at first sight. Their first time having sex with each other is in a romantic setting with candles and rose petals. They instantly have this connection and attraction. So in my head, this is how I always thought my first time would be. Okay...to be real, I knew it probably wasn't going to be up to that standards, but I could dream, right!? My freshman year of college, I was crazy about this boy. The moment I saw him, I thought he was super sexy. He had this longish/skater hair, blue eyes, and a beautiful tan. In the back of my mind I wanted to end up him. As I went on other dates with a couple of other guys, I still had that same dude in the back of my head. Long story short I went on a movie date with him the second semester of my freshman year. After the film, he asked if I wanted to hook up. I honestly got the wrong impression of the guy. By asking me that on our first date, I thought he was just using me. After getting to know him a little bit more, it turns out, he just wanted to lose his virginity. I REALLY wanted to be in a relationship, so I agreed to lose it to him (thinking something would come of it). Part of me was also curious about this new exploration. So, I agreed to have sex with him the last week of freshman year. Afterwards, I was honestly heart broken because the following semester I planned on doing an internship in New Jersey. After long debates, though I knew I couldn't get this guy out of my head. I couldn't go another 9 months without seeing if I could make it work with him. So, I declined my internship and went back to Stout for the fall semester.

 After a month into my sophomore year, that same boy asked me to be his girlfriend! We've been dating for 2.5 years now, and I couldn't be happier. Let me just say though that there is a difference between intimacy and love. That first time we had sex was merely just to pleasure ourselves, but now having sex allows us to connect with each other in a whole different way. I trust him, and he trusts me.

After finishing up this semester of Healthy Couple Relationships, it is crazy to think about how pretty much all the topics we discussed can come together and make a full circle. This topic of intimacy can relate to the topic of the five love languages. As stated in a previous post, my love language is a tie between physical touch and receiving gifts. When my boyfriend and I are intimate, specifically sexually, physical touch is important to me. I enjoy lots of strokes of my hair and things of that sort.

This topic of intimacy and physical touch also relate to long distance relationships. As mentioned in a previous post my boyfriend and I are forced to do long distance for the summer being that we live in two different states. Since my love language is physical touch, this is one of the hardest parts of long distance relationships. I miss cuddling in bed and or just a goodbye hug before I go to work. So, it is no surprise that when we discussed in class that physical touch is a challenge of long distance relationships. That comfort of having your partner there is irreplaceable. That explains why whenever I would visit my boyfriend in the summer, the first thing that I would want to do was to just cuddle on the couch and watch television. It is not the most romantic or season appropriate activity being that we could be outside swimming or something. I did not feel guilty of not being outside though because it felt great to be in his presence again. After we felt we had enough intimate time, we then had our fun in the sun. For summer visits we would do things such as go swimming at Wisconsin Dells, go to the driving range to practice golf, go hiking at scenic places, and go on long bike rides.

My boyfriend is not one to just spend money out of the blue. Instead, he will meet my needs of gift giving for my five love languages by splurging on food. So, for example, during the summer when we were seeing each other for the 4^th of July weekend, he got me a grape slushie and a funnel cake. I did not really want him to spend the money on the overpriced food, but he insisted that we can not go to the fair without carnival food. There was also this other time where he went overboard on spending food. We went out for our one year anniversary to a fancy steak restaurant. It is the kind of restaurant where if you do not have a reservation, you will not be getting a seat until two hours later. My boyfriend failed to make a reservation but luckily there was room at their fancy bar area. It meant a lot to me that he bought me a $50 steak for dinner plus dessert.

While words of affirmation is not one of my main  love languages, I still think it is important to me. For Valentine’s Day or our anniversary, I look forward to reading his love notes in cards that he gives me. They are just the sweetest and I love saving them!

Now that this blogging assignment is done, I can say that while it was sometimes difficult at times, I did find it enjoyable. The main aspect that I enjoyed the most was the design aspect. I love to be creative, so I found choosing the layouts and the fonts of the blog template to be super fun. I also enjoy photography, so it was a great excuse to use some of my previous photography work. This blog is also a great way for me to look back at some of my favorite memories. All of my posts involved my boyfriend and our relationship in some way or another. I wanted to stick to that because his and I’s relationship is the deepest in comparison to other relationships like me and my mom.

The majority of my posts discussed our relationship in a general form. I did not go into details of a specific event (with the exception of two or three posts). Instead, I discussed things such as our personalities in general, how I acted when I was younger, etc. I am generally more of a reserved person, so I’m not surprised that many entries did not go into intimate events. As I was reading through my posts, it brought back some moments that I had forgotten about. I remember vividly being at Market Place and saw blue moon ice cream in the frozen food section. I immediately added it to my cart to buy for my boyfriend since it is his favorite ice cream. I remember trying it for the first time with him and thinking it tasted like almonds. He thought I was a little crazy for thinking that. Turns out, after that night, he told me it was not his favorite ice cream any more. This is not the first time that he has done something like that. He told me that one of his favorite movies is The Notebook. After we watched it together he once again changed his mind about it being one of his favorites.

Another post that sparked some memories was the one mentioning that late night water fiasco. I was thirsty one night last year and was too lazy to go down to the vending machine, so I asked my boyfriend if he would be so kind to go downstairs and get me a beverage. I remember him being so mad that I asked him. To me it was no big deal. He was raised though to fetch his own belongings if he wanted something. To this day, he still has yet to forget it. We do not normally fight, but if we do, it is normally stupid like a stupid bottle of water.

Overall, I really enjoyed this project. It was fun to apply class lectures to my every day life and experiences. I think it helped me retain the information better as well. Instead of just merely memorizing the class lectures notes, I was able to connect it to real life examples.